benji-moto'

i like benji as a name for the little furry one (don't know why) and staal has been calling him motor sometimes because he purrs so much.  so...benji-moto', though i'll probably mostly just call him benji.  i think it sounds like the name of some ancient japanese poet.  maybe there's a book in it.  poems and short stories inspired by the lessons this little fuzz ball will share with me as we get to know each other ---the wisdom of benji-moto', illustrations and translation (from cat to english) by melina wade staal.

a little one

a couple days ago a local woman found a kitten (only 5-6 weeks old), alone, covered in stickers, and very hungry.  she posted a video of him on social media asking if anyone could give him a home.  i watched the video.  i wasn't sure what i was feeling.  i slept on it.  then yesterday morning i watched the video again and contacted the woman and asked if anyone had shown an interest in him.  she said no.  i wrestled with thoughts and emotions.  talked with staal to see how he felt.  agonized some more and finally told the woman we would take him.  we met her in bootjack at the little market/gas station around 12:30,  picked him up and brought him home.   he has been purring loudly and pretty much continuously since yesterday.

kitten specifications:  he was pretty dirty so i gave him a bath.  no fleas or ticks.  he's skin and bones but seems healthy otherwise (will get him a vet check soon).  he's eating soft, solid food but is young enough he still wants to nurse so i may try bottle feeding him for a while in addition to the solid food.  he's playful and inquisitive and sweet and completely fascinated with zane.  he doesn't seem able to meow but he purrs like a maniac.  he's going to be an indoor cat but i'm going to leash train him so he can come outside with me.  haven't given him an name yet.

here he is...

getting ready for a dip in the sink

helping me and zane keep an eye on the ducks while they forage

snuggled in for a snooze

feeling frisky

purring...

i don't feel fully ready for all of this but it still seems right.  this little one needs a good, loving, safe home and i want to give that to him.

mama cat update

i saw mama cat again on the 15th.  after i'd fed 'migo and the creature in the morning i decided i'd go look around a little and see if i could find her.  i felt myself drawn down the goat road (the long driveway across the street from us---our neighbors at the end of it have a goat grazing business).  i walked down to the lowrimore's place which is only occupied when the family comes to vacation in the spring.   the lowrimore's is the perfect place for a mama cat to stash some kittens.  it's quiet with tons of hidey holes under the mobile home and in the little outbuildings surrounding it.  i felt she was nearby but i didn't see her.

that afternoon, a few minutes after i'd let the ducks out to forage something in my peripheral vision caught my attention and i looked down our driveway and across the street and there she was, sitting in the goat road looking back at me.  i walked down to the end of our driveway and talked to her.  asked her if she was going to bring her babies.  she meowed me a little and then turned and slowly walked down the goat road and up the lowrimore's driveway.  she stayed in the open the whole way even though she could have easily disappeared into the tall grass.  it seemed like she wanted me to know where she was.

i probably should have followed her but i didn't.  i felt like i needed to stay with the ducks and let them have their time to forage since i had just let them out.  when i got the ducks back in i mixed up some cat food and went to see if i could find her.  i looked and i called but she didn't show.  i walked home and put the food in the fridge, hoping she would come over later in the evening to eat, but she didn't.

i've been over looking for her several times since but haven't seen any sign of her or her kittens.  in a way i feel like i let her down.  i hope she and her kittens are okay. 

i had a dream last night that i was over at lowrimore's looking for her and saw a food pan on the ground as if someone else was feeding her.  maybe that afternoon she just came to say goodbye.  maybe she found somewhere she felt more comfortable and someone is taking care of her.  i hope so.

tribute

miss you, jack sprat

little black mama cat

she first showed up two weeks ago.  it was late afternoon and i happened to glance out the kitchen window and saw her just past the sycamore tree.  in a way i had been expecting her.  i was having a hard day, crying over jack, and had just had an interesting experience while half-napping.  i first had a strong sensation of being sort of enveloped in soft black and i saw/felt jack's smiling face.  i rested in the sensation until it faded after a minute or so.  i sat up and while wide awake had a dream---a little black cat about jack's size was in the house just inside the front door.  i had the sense that the cat was making itself at home in some way.  though it looked very much like jack i knew that it wasn't. 
i went into the bathroom and washed the tears from my face and then went into the kitchen.  staal was doing something at the kitchen sink and i stood next to him and looked out the kitchen window.  there she was, checking out some gopher holes.  i went out the front door and called "here, kitty, kitty..."  she was panting and meowing to me as i continued to talk to her and move a bit closer.  she was very skittish and wouldn't let me get close, retreating to the brush on the other side of the creek.  she sat in the brush for a while meowing back to me after each time i called her.  after a few minutes she disappeared deeper into the tangle of manzanita and poison oak.  i put some water out for her near the creek (which has dried up for the summer) and went about the rest of the day.

she kept quite a distance from me but from what i could see of her she looked to be in milk.  i've been thinking about her and where she might have her nest of kittens, hoping she and her babies are all okay.

she showed up again wednesday (8/14/19) evening around 6-6:30pm (i had dreamed black cats all night the previous night).  again i happened to look out the kitchen window and saw her sitting by one of the pine rounds that marks the driveway.  staal and i called her through the window and this time she came running toward the house meowing and panting.  i went outside and she spooked a little at first because she heard zane whine and bark.  she didn't go far, just around to the back side of the house.  i went back and talked to her and told her i'd get her some food and she seemed to understand. 

i first thought to bring her some of the kibble i take to the wild cats across the street but then thought some wet food would be a much better choice because i figured she was probably panting from being a bit dehydrated from nursing kittens in the heat.  i mixed up a bowl of the food i'd been feeding jack and billy.  it's a dehydrated food that you mix with water to get whatever consistency your cat prefers.  she was very hungry and scarfed down the food in less than a minute.

after she finished the food i gave her she was still meowing so i mixed her another bowl.  i ended up giving her a total of three full bowls of food and one that was half food and half water to get some good fluid into her.  when she'd finished the fourth bowl she seemed satisfied and quieted down.  she had stopped panting and sat, with a very full belly, licking her lips.  i kept talking to her and told her to come back when she got hungry again and to bring her babies with her.  she sort of came toward me like she was saying thank you and would have enjoyed some petting but she wasn't willing to make any contact that would put her at risk of not being able to get back to her babies. 

when she started to leave i followed at a distance to see where she might have her kittens but she quickly gave me the slip.  maybe she'll be back.

wild things

i miss jack and billy everyday.  i still get to have some cat time when i go over to feed 'migo and that has helped.  for the last couple weeks there has been another cat joining 'migo for breakfast most days.  he's a mostly black tom with a striped face.  i'd seen him around a few times in the last couple years but he never let me get too close.  it's possible he was part of the original colony we inherited when we bought the property across the street.
a couple weeks ago when i was over feeding 'migo i heard some meowing coming from one of the wood sheds so i called "here, kitty, kitty..." to see who it was and this dark creature with big yellow eyes, that for some reason reminded me instantly of one of maurice sendak's wild things ( where the wild things are ), came out toward me meowing a strange wild meow and offered his huge head and neck for petting and scratching.  it was pretty neat.
both 'migo and the creature are very much wild things so it's not quite like interacting with a truly domestic cat but i'm grateful for the contact they allow me and try to respect their boundaries.

he looks fluffy around the face/neck but that is all skull and muscle

the wild things in action (the tale twining is very sweet)...

the creature...

nice to be able to go where the wild things are when i need them.

august 5th

jack and billy were orphaned at a few days old and my aunt kathryn was bottle feeding them and their three siblings when i visited one day.  i fell in love with them and brought them home with me that day, the 20th of august 2005.  they were tiny and helpless.  i bottle fed them every few hours and kept them warm and safe---i was a pretty good mama cat.  their eyes had just recently opened and they were somewhere between crawling and just starting to walk on wobbly little legs.  i figured they were about 2 weeks old so i chose august 5th as a birth date for them (my aunt may know the actual date of their births).  today they would have been 14 years old (i'm giving jack the full 14 since he was so close and he definitely earned it).  jack and billy's sister, sophia, still lives with my aunt kathryn.  she's become quite the queen of the castle...

happy birthday, sophia louise whitestocking!

i miss jack and billy very much and today i celebrate their lives and give thanks for the time we had together.  here are a few videos i took of them over the years (because i need to hear them and see them today).


a couple days after bringing them home.  the light is too dim to see much but the best part is billy's enormous purr coming out of his tiny body...

early explorations on the porch in catheys valley...

happy little savages...

miss that purr...

love bites...

he was a talker...

happy birthday, my little beasties, i love you.